Tuesday, October 18, 2005
Enlightenment
We say life kinda stinks big time with all the seemingly endless flow of examinations coming right at u. But is that truly so? I kinda doubt that now... because of a certain self-experiment/experience =P
The retarded EOY Examinations. Everyone studied hard for it. Tuitions, Assessments, Burning of Night Oil, u name them... Everyone did them, well, nearly everyone, Except me. See, i never felt the importance of the Exams and Grades in myself. Kind of took things for granted. Tests after Tests... Exams after Exams... I got sick of them, so i decided, i might don't give a damn about them. And so i didnt. The problems always revolved around the academic, the results. Everytime i dont do well, there would always be my desserts. Disappointments, Lectures, Heartache, Etc. But now, no more Post-hell Disappointments(PhD), no more Post-Hell heartaches, no more post-hell lectures, as i knew i didnt really study for it, so theres nothing much to be disappointed/heartbroken about, and my results are not that crap, so no lectures either. Still, there came another problem. That problem caused me to become disordered. It caused me to become thoroughly weak too. But at the very least, it made me realise what was really important. That problem, is Boredom.
Ah yes, Boredom, Boredom. Woot, what the hell? Due to the change in mentality regarding the ignorance of Tests and Exams, i became carefree. Oh yeah, Very carefree. To the extent I GOT BORED TO TEARS DAMIT. I stare at the stupid comp everyday, morning to night, playing the same few games with the same few people. Not that i dont like it, but i realise, i no longer have a realistic(according to jinyi language, this means not virtual, not in-game -_-") short term goal. Hence, just what am i doing playing all day long? Look at it carefully. Exams Over. Everyone is happy. Everyone. Except the same person again. Me. Why? BECAUSE LIFE PRE-EXAM AND LIFE POST-EXAM IS THE SAME FOR ME GOD DamIT. So now, i have absolutely nothing realistic(again, same meaning) to long for. Those who care for the Exams and Tests. They have high-tides and low-tides. Tests and Exams coming, they prepare for them. While each Test passes and disappears from their lives, they give themselves a certain length of breathing period. EOY Exams are over and so is a year of hell, They celebrate as if they were at a party, not an exam room(like the 3B1 ppl next door..Class You Are Dismissed... 3B1: WOOOO YAY!!! YAY!! WOOO!!!). People start organizing outings, etc, and are jubilant about every little thing. As for me? No. No change. My world has No Tide. No Breathing Periods. No Suffocating Periods Too(No, its not exactly a good thing, either). Kind of pointless. Exams are Coming! Play! Exams Today! Play! Exams Over! Play Lah Damit What Has Exams Got To Do With ME!? Play Play Play Play Play Play Play Play Play PLAY!!! Bah... if i typed that a billion times... im sure every1 would get sick of it... well... i have done that to my life... now im getting bored omfg lol... Perhaps what that makes things interesting now everyday is the every little thing that goes on Both Realistically and Virtually. Like my brothers monkeying around, friends asking me out, or friends in-game crapping with me. But Hell.. Life is becoming a routine for me... Its utterly crap lah k... I guess it was my own folly to forget about the dumb exams...
Hence... Thx To The Friggin Word BOREDOM, I am Enlightened*Place head in front of beaming Sun and pretend meditate...*
Exams ARE important.
EVERY Test Makes a Difference.
They Are NOT Boring.
They Are There NOT JUST For Academics.
They Are There NOT JUST For The Sake of Being There.
They Are There For MORE REASONS Than You Can Imagine.
But No... No no no...
That doesnt Mean I Will Cease Heck-Caring Exams...
Afterall...
IM ENJOYING IT =D
Jinius Tan Ha Ha [10/18/2005 04:16:00 PM]
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