.~*The Realistic Life...My Sullen World*~.

Sunday, August 21, 2005

I couldnt sleep properly throughout the weekend. Thx to one of my teachers, or rather, Ex-Teacher. Somehow, I wished i had been less defiant...

Humans only regret the loss of good things around them when they lose them, do they not? Indeed, i feel so. I only felt this utmost remorse after my English teacher revealed she was teaching us English for the last time ever in our time in CTSS, unless there are special cases. It wasnt as if i had been a keen listener during her lessons. No, i never was one. As a matter of fact, i was and will always be one of the few who always get kicked out of class for having incomplete homework. I had been a kill-joy in her lesson periods all too often. Not occupying myself with the assigned tasks, and getting kicked out of her class for perhaps the most amount of times as an individual, my presence during her lessons certainly didnt help, one way or another. Yet she had always shown respectable patience and tolerance to me whenever such a thing happened. In her agonizing 8 and a half months with us, she had only flaired up once, and that was when majority of the class didnt complete the holiday assignments despite the 4 weeks given to them, and i was included. Yet at that time, i was shoved out of her class before she even started her lecture, as i was one of the 1st few to be caught with incomplete homework. Hence, i have never experienced a scolding by her, and i really feel a need for it. Incomplete compositions, untouched comprehension, rude and improper letter-writings, those were what i gave her all the time, if not handing up nothing. To very much my shock and disgust, i insulted the president of being assassinated in the rain in my compo "Drizzle", and received 22/30 for it. Undeserving of it i really am. I tried to make her reprimand me for not handing up all these assignments, by not handing more of them up again and again, yet she just rebuffed me out of the class. Perhaps i should have shown her some attitude to make her scold, but i just couldnt. With each incomplete homework that i handed up, as well as each piece of work i did not do, yet emerging unscathed, the remorse within just gets worst. I wished she had reprimanded me. At least for once, and make that a big one. But it never happened. To make things worst, She even nominated me to be part of the Student Council. Again, shocked and disgusted i felt. If she did not say the following few words on the day of my Student Council Interview, "Eih... You must do your best and get into the Council arh... i have faith in you", i would have perhaps told mr murali right in the face and down the nerves that i seriously do not know why i am being interviewed. Yet with what She said, i had a last minute change of plans. Bearing what i owe her in mind, i went on to get interviewed with what i believe was the most factual and my 1st interview i ever had, and got into the Council, For her sake. Indeed. Without her, i dont know what is to become of me, seriously. I tried to indicate to her i will miss her lessons on Friday after school, whether she liked it or not, with all the jokes and sarcastic remarks she supplied the class with all the time. I dont know whether she took it by heart, but i just want to make known something.

Mrs Ng. Thank you for everything you have done for me. No other teacher has ever done so much for me. I will be Always and for Evermore be Indebted to you.

Thank You Mrs Ng.

Jinius Tan Ha Ha [8/21/2005 07:34:00 AM]

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